I've survived my first full month in my new town, but it doesn't feel like such a huge accomplishment. I came here looking for so many things, and didn't find any of those things, and I'm okay with that. Isn't that funny? I found things I never knew I wanted, and am doing just fine without the things I thought I would need. I've made friends up here--great friends. I cook on my own, I clean on my own, I am my own self. I've drawn away from the crowd, I guess you could say I left proud, and into the Unknown. Before I left, someone told me, "Doors are going to open, doors you never knew existed". I now understand those doors, and I'm open to the ones that have yet to appear. I guess this is what the Zen is talking about--neither acquiescent nor rebellious, but innocent and spontaneous and true to my own being. I now understand how important last year was--getting an entire year to live at home and figure out who I was, so that I know and can be my own self and explore my own self up here, away from everything and everyone that knows who I am. I miss home, that's for sure. But I love this alternate universe called Chico that I live in too.
So here's to October being filled with Rebirth and exploration of myself. I ask that I go into with no expectations, so that I can truly be amazed with not only the people I'm surrounded by, but also myself. It is, after all, a time of growth and change.
Hey Cassandra! Nice blog! Nice sunset photo too. :-)
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